Everyone enters into a relationship with a set of expectations real or imagined. Unfortunately, most relationship expectations are based on an individual’s point of view while neglecting how the potential partner looks at the world. No matter how strong a belief you have about relationships, unrealistic expectations could ruin a union long before it begins. For instance, coming up with a list of qualities of potential partners only narrows your possibilities of finding true love. If you have been hurt in previous relationships you could end up looking at the opposite sex with a lot of suspicions.
It is important to be aware of all the possible toxic relationship expectations in order to avoid disappointments in the future. Here are the most common relationship expectations that could ruin a potentially successful union:
1. Your Partner Will Make You Happy
One of the most unhealthy relationship expectations is to think that your partner will make you happy. If you are not careful, you will discover you have no chance to be happy after you have entered into the relationship. But can a lover really make you happy? True happiness comes from within and is not a function of your partner’s actions. One way to avoid this weird expectation is to nurture yourself, build your self-esteem, and pursue your ambitions and goals. You can only be happy if you get into the relationship as a whole package. Failure to do so is a recipe for frustration. You cannot expect to succeed in any relationship.
2. Your Partner Will Change for You
One of the things that people agree on universally is that ‘love is blind’. For most individuals, physical attraction is what gets them into relationships. Once in a relationship, they discover their partners have major weaknesses. For example, your partner could be a serial cheater. Yet you expect him or her to change for you. Staying in such a relationship can leave you very frustrated and with no option but to get out. You should remember that you cannot change your partner, however you can change yourself and your reaction.
3. Your Partner Will Always Give You Great Sex
Forget about what you see in those blue movies. In real life, great sex takes time and effort. It rarely comes automatically or on a whim. First, your mind should be engaged. Once the two of you are in the right frame of mind, you can take the physical steps toward great sex. For example, foreplay is a must. Neglecting this important step makes sex flat and soulless. Whether you are a man or a woman, you will feel less satisfied if one of your relationship expectations is for your partner to always satisfy you.
4. Your Partner Would Know What You Need When You Need It
It is unrealistic to expect your partner to know and fulfill all your needs. We cannot read each other’s minds, right? What if he or she was to disappoint you? For example, some people expect to find a ready hot meal when they come back from work. Others expect certain gifts on given occasions. Unfortunately, they get disappointed when these expectations are not met. No human being has the ability to know what’s on your mind. If you do not stop having these kinds of relationship expectations, you will end up going separate ways. So get real and tell your partner what you want them to do for you.
5. Your Partner Will Always Be Happy
People in a relationship undergo all sorts of physical and emotional changes. There’s no way that your partner will always be happy at the same time as you. Life happens to everyone. On some occasions, your partner will be depressed, angry, upset, sad, or mad. It all depends on what happens around them. For example, your partner could be going through a hard time at work. Instead of complaining about how grumpy they look, you should support them to overcome the problem. Just lend a sympathetic ear and be patient about it. If you keep complaining about your partner’s lack of excitement, you could end up driving a wedge between the two of you. This isn’t going to make your relationship any better.
If you caught yourself on having any of these relationship expectations, it’s time for you to change how you look at things. Not only will you be able to easily enter into a new healthy relationship, but you will also make them stronger.