You are in love with your second-half, your relationship are on the good level- you trust and support each, so the idea about the “moving in together” seems right. However, there are still a lot of things you should consider before this serious step. So, in this article we would like to talk about financial questions you should discuss before moving in.
Yes, it is not romantic and may be you do not want to discuss such “primitive” topic as money, but experience shows that it is hard to avoid these questions. Thus, try to discuss it and you will have fewer conflicts in the future.
Talk about your financial opportunities
We all have different incomes and sometimes couples are embarrassed to talk about it. But just imagine it as a chance to share experiences and avoid unnecessary conflicts in the future. Actually, there is no ideal scenario for such dialogue, moreover, it is not easy conversation, but as soon as you move into the discussion, you will feel more comfortable.
So, first! This is not about giving each other copies of your bank statements. You just have to reveal your average income. Let us explain why. For example, you and your partner are going to buy something in the apartment. Knowing the average income of your second-half will help you to avoid awkward situations, because you will consider the opportunities of each other.
How are you going to split expenses?
You should identify what is “yours”, “mine” and “ours”. Maybe it sounds rude; however, you will be surprised how sometimes couples can be mistaken in the questions about general and separate spending.
For example, after three months of living together you may suddenly realize that you are buying all the household things (napkins, paper towels and cleaning products). It is even not about the money, but the fact that your partner decided to put all the housework on your shoulders.
Meanwhile, most probably he has no idea that it annoys you. So, in order to avoid such situation, you should discuss it. Discuss all expenses you want to share. Write it down, if it helps. You can create spreadsheet in Google Docs and keep records of the purchases, so it will be easier to split your common expenses.
How does your family solve financial questions?
It is not a secret that we all have emotional baggage associated with our family. In other words, children usually copy the behavior of their parents. Maybe your mother did not work a day and all the money for expenses were provided by your father. Thus, you have an opinion that you partner should take responsibility for that too.
However, your partner may have another attitude to this question, so it is better to talk about it. Understanding the atmosphere that shaped your (and his) financial behavior will help you to make decision and manage personal and shared funds.
Do you have any bank loans?
There are a lot of cases when partner suddenly found out that their second half have huge debts after moving in, so they may face unpleasant financial problems in the future. However, this topic is quite personal and sometimes it is uncomfortable to ask about it.
Discussion of this topic is the sign that you already close enough and trust each other. Try to clarify how much does your partner owe and whom, because it will directly affect your financial situation. In addition, this information reflects your partner’s ability to manage the finances. But remember that bad credit story does not mean that person is bad in finances; it might be just a misunderstanding or a temporary loan.
How are we going to plan serious purchases?
Maybe you want to buy a house or open a coffee shop, but your second half wants to go to Bali. It is better to discuss it at first. You do not have to create 20-year plan, just discuss the points you hope to bring to life next year counting on common funds.
Do not be afraid! You are going to live with someone you love. Your partner knows you well, your strengths and weaknesses. So share your ideas with each other discuss and support and maybe common budget will open new horizons for you.
Living together is a serious step and kind of rehearsal of family life. Coordinated solutions of financial problems play an important role in it. So talk about it, because good conversation can solve a lot of problems and moving in will be a pleasant experience for you.
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