All relationships and marriages, every single one, goes through its ups and downs. It doesn’t matter how long the relationship has been or how soon a couple married after meeting. It doesn’t matter if you have kids, or if you both work. There are going to be disagreements. There are going to be dry spells. Things will get so comfortable and normal that you may get tired of the same routine or even a bit annoyed with each other. The same dinners, the same tv shows together, the same errands out together, week after week. You still love your partner, the spark and passion you both once had has simply died out or weakened anyways. It is okay when you and your partner start to feel this way, it is normal. You don’t have to jump ship. You don’t have to blame the other person or make excuses. Just explore things a little. What can you and your partner do to change things up and spice up your marriage a bit? What can the both of you do to make your time together less boring?
You just need to look at it in a new perspective and be honest with each other. Add to your lives, or to your routine, or simply change one little thing at a time. It could make the world of difference and spark even the tiniest bit of excitement back into your lives together and marriage.
Don’t Skimp on the Little Things
Sometimes all you may be missing in your relationship is each other’s presence. Maybe you have kids that take up your time, or you both work and don’t get to see each other as much as you would like. Maybe life just gets in the way sometimes. But even just the little things like holding hands while in the store. A nice long hug a couple of times a day. Or even making a point to send a sweet text every day to show them you still care. This shows that even though you two may not be together all the time.
You still love each other. Holding hands and random hugs, for example, show the connection. It is a person to person contact, which can be comforting on its own. Maybe even give a little smack on the butt when you walk by them in the kitchen. Finding those little moments will help keep the spark alive.
Get Pleasantly Vocal
I’m talking about flirting. I’m talking about complimenting your partner as regularly as possible. Why did you fall in love with them in the first place? What makes them beautiful, or handsome, in your eyes? Tell them! If they get a new haircut or do something adorable, let them know.
Send them cute little texts or maybe spicier texts, to let them know how great they are or to get the mood started before they get home. Hearing these things from the ones you love are always day changers and can keep you and your partner from feeling unwanted.
Get Intimate and Have Fun
This should go without saying but yes! Being intimate with your partner will always bring your relationship out of the gutter. I’m not just talking about having sex, either. Even though that is an obvious one, sometimes that gets dull too. Find a fun game to add to the sexy time or flirty lingerie to spice up the mood. Visit an adult store and shop around, throw some new spicy ideas to an already fun activity.
Maybe send some pictures to start the mood. Another underrated thing is simply saying “yes” to something. If your partner brings up a fun activity or sexy new idea for you two to try. Don’t immediately shut it down simply because you don’t feel like or it’s different. Talk it out, or test it out a bit. You never know, it may be your new favourite thing. There are so many ways to be intimate and have fun. Explore and always share what you like or don’t like with your partner. So everyone is happy.
Surprise, Surprise, and Surprise again!
Who doesn’t love a good surprise? And there are so many ways that you can surprise that special someone in your life. Does your husband work and you’re a stay at home mom/wife? Simply, dress up a little. Put on that outfit he absolutely adores you in and a bit of that gorgeous perfume. Seeing you looking like that after being at work all day will definitely brighten his mood.
Or hubbies, before you get home, swing by to pick up some flowers or her favourite candy. Maybe even a bottle of her favourite Cabernet. She will be all over you for sure. And of course, there are other little surprises that could make a world of difference. Surprise you significant other with a movie date night. Make a cute little picnic on the floor with your softest blankets and good romcom to set the mood. Or even just bringing them something while they are on their lunch break and stopping in to say hey! The possibilities are endless.
Time is Key
When it all boils down, making time for each other is the number one key ingredient to a long-lasting and healthy relationship. Life can get crazy, busy. Work and kids may seem like a nonstop obstacle but there is always time. You may have to move a meeting here or schedule a babysitter there. But you will feel so much better and closer to each other for it. And then on those weeks when you just can’t have a date night or things are just too much, don’t forget about the little things. Send those cute little texts, cuddle when you get a moment on the couch together. You and your partner fell in love for a reason. You two are absolutely perfect for each other.
It’s all in your hands…
Don’t let your comfort and routine dry out your relationship and make things feel tense. It will cause strain and pain when it is all said and done and you don’t deserve that over a little boredom. There will always be hard times, too, but you should know that this is life and therefore is absolutely normal. Also, what has always held me from spoiling my own relationship is an understanding that breaking what I have is much easier than maintaining it. And as far as I don’t like easy ways, I always choose to try to maintain, compromise, or spice up my marriage as much as I can.
